This picture is hilarious to me. Hillary has perfected a sort of horizontal marionette act with Bernie Sanders. That’s not a metaphor. I’m just making fun of people’s appearances like a normal American. Don’t yell at me! Hillary has gone full Hermione Granger here. She’s like “I didn’t want to do this but… Accio Delegatums!” … Continue reading Bippity boppity Bernie
Dear Beyonce, Ma’am. Ma’am! I did not realize the registration fee for the revolution was going to be so high. First of all, thank you. You are a phenomenal performer, businessperson, icon and GIF-factory. We are lucky to share the Earth with you. Second of all, what the fuck are you doing charging me all this money … Continue reading Concert Dreams, Cheddar Bay Budget
David wondered, “suppose we adopt a white kid. By 2020 whites won’t be in the majority. Do you think they’ll have a different understanding of white culture?”
And then we talked for like an hour about what white culture is without once mentioning a pumpkin spice latte.
The Aunty Who Is A Deaconess at a Megachurch The Aunty Who Met Michelle Obama Once And Is Now A Life Coach The Aunty Who Keeps It Current By Hanging Out with Rodrigo, Her Gay Friend from Zumba The Aunty Who Talks About How She Used to Change Your Diaper Every Time She Sees You … Continue reading The 12 Kinds of Aunties You Will Meet in Your Lifetime (As Told by The Wiz Live)
(This post originally appeared on ijusthaveafewnotes.com in November 2013. That’s why some of the references are hella old. I haven’t updated them because time is a construct.) There’s a few list-icles being passed around of late that are variations on the theme “Things Every Gay Man Should Do Before Death”. Actually, only one is “Before Death”, … Continue reading The Internet Sure Does Have a Lot of Opinions
Huge news! I have a new play premiering! In Miami! Florida! This week! Short story: My play Human Resources, is running from June 4-28 as part of City Theatre’s 20th Anniversary Summer Shorts Festival. I know, right?! THAT IS A PICTURE OF THE CAST OF A PLAY I WROTE. SOME OF THEM ARE PUPPETS. GIRL I CAN’T EVEN. … Continue reading ABC: Always Be Confetti Cannon
Bad news from my orthopedic surgeon, guys. He says I have FOMO. It stands for Fear of Missing Out. My orthopedic surgeon has a lot of opinions about my social life. And my left knee. But who the hell cares about being able to walk when everyone is hanging out without you? It’s devastating. You … Continue reading 7 Things That Happen When All Your Friends Are At The Beach