The Aunty Who Is A Deaconess at a Megachurch
The Aunty Who Met Michelle Obama Once And Is Now A Life Coach
The Aunty Who Keeps It Current By Hanging Out with Rodrigo, Her Gay Friend from Zumba
The Aunty Who Talks About How She Used to Change Your Diaper Every Time She Sees You (And Also Asks for $5)
The Aunty Who Is Woke AF and Doesn’t Give A Damn About Your Gender Norms
The Aunty Who Used to Be a “Backup Dancer” for “Tom Jones” and Then She Found Jesus
BEFORE:
AFTER:
Praise him!
The Aunty Who’s Always Like “Give Me Some Sugar!”
The Aunty Who’s Been Going Through It Since Her “Roommate” Robin Left for the Peace Corps
The Aunty Who Likes To Sit By Her Window and Yell At Those Loud Ass Kids In the Street Who Ain’t Got No Home Training
The Aunty Who Is Secretly Your Mom And Had You in 7th Grade
The Aunty Who Uses Every Available Opportunity To Give Her Testimony
And finally, The Aunty Who Is Obvi Your Favorite (because she taught you how to drive and snuck you a beer at that Thanksgiving when you we a freshman in college and randomly texts you “What is eggplant Friday?” and clips coupons for that deodorant you like and loves you like you were her own)